November 2008 Club Meeting
by Geoff Erbes
Ye Gods!
by Lee Torrence
A rather small attendance sat on 9th November to, I gather, an eagerly anticipated return of another piece of work by Lee Torrance which afterwards was agreed to have been both humorous and well crafted.
Written for Radio some 3 or 4 years ago we got off to a funny start up in the clouds or heavens. Where an animated and mischievous Jupiter, (suitably voiced with god like flowing beard an all, by Denis Evans,) was hurling thunderbolts willy nilly down to a semi in suburbia, on poor old planet earth.
Caught in the act by his wife Juno, sublimely portrayed by Patti Page, Jupiter wriggled and squealed like a naughty school boy - (I'm sure was aptly aided by a god like echo machine or was it just Denis' vocal qualities?). Anyway, further questioning from Juno eventually revealed that old Jupiter was chasing his lost youth or hormones and portraying his new love for a mere mortal in the shape of long suffering Sheila down in Suburbia.
The play shot us down to earth where we eavesdropped on Sheila (Anita) visiting her very mundane partner Arthur (Giles). They were trapped indoors by a thunderstorm, with heavy rain which was intensified by the odd thunderbolt courtesy of jealous old Jupiter up above. Arthur's dialogue portrayed him as quite a boring individual, stuck in a mundane job with no prospects and little romance despite Sheila's attempts at conjuring up some passion whilst watching the rain beat against the window. We learnt of their many years together as a couple, but to Sheila's frustration, no signs of marriage yet.
Back up in Valhalla, Cupid (Nick Quirke) came to the ringside to act as Jupiter's second, pouring scorn on his unsuccessful attempts at even gaining Sheila's attention down on earth. Following Cupid's advice to get with it when attempting to make love to a mere mortal, Jupiter transcended to earth to make contact with the maiden of his desires.
Walking home after the thunderstorm, Sheila passed a small pond and was attracted to the majesty of a large swan that she had never noticed before. Unfortunately as the large swan approached her, flapping its huge wings to impress, Sheila took fright, only to be saved by a passing stranger who beat the wailing swan about the head with a handy stick.
Returning to Valhalla, poor old Jupiter is nursing his bruised head, whilst Cupid still pours scorn on his champion's feeble methods of courtship and duly advises he try a more personal touch as preferred by mortals down on earth. We return to Arthur's home where his sprightly mum, Mrs. Victor (Jenny) bemoans that after 4 years of courtship, her son has not yet married that nice girl Sheila. Meanwhile Cupid is offering more words of advice to Jupiter up above.
We move to where Sheila is babysitting alone and watching the TV, when a knock at the front door reveals Jupiter in the guise of a man who rather niftily is admitted to the front room where he extols compliments to Sheila and a friendly relationship are established.
Cupid defends his tactics to the ever watchful Juno, explaining that Jupiter is breaking all the rules and ignoring his advice, yet is inexplicably gaining mileage with his romantic endeavours towards the young mortal Sheila. So Juno decides to intervene, and sets about wooing the unromantic Arthur who is still unaware of his girlfriend's new friendship with a chap called Peter. Juno introduces herself as June at the tennis club and with her magical prowess enables the limp Arthur to discover hidden talent on court and soundly thrash the local Tennis ace.
Arthur is impressed with his new strength and likens to June as a taliswoman and their friendship also blossoms. He then is offered a new Job from the tennis sponsor for twice the money, things are looking up whilst in June's company.
Sheila confides in Arthur's mother that she is in love with someone else and it is only a matter of time before the audience realise that our two couples will collide at the forthcoming Dance. As these two romances are doomed to failure from the start a double exit is staged at the midnight hour when Sheila and Arthur realise their destiny is with each other.
Returning to Valhalla Jupiter is astonished to discover his wife's role in teaching him a lesson in mortal life and that Juno is after all his ideal partner and wife.
The audience were all happy with the characters, plot and storyline. The only small comment was that perhaps, in today's world, Peter / Jupiter would not have gained entry into the house where Sheila was babysitting with such ease and no valid ID. None the less, an entertaining story.
October Club Meetingby John Brennen
Elizabeth and Jack
by Pat Jackson
An alien from another planet, eventually to be known as Elizabeth, Denise Boxall materialises on Earth as a human being in the first decade of the twenty-first century as part of a project devised by her mentor, Talyn, Dennis Evans. She is supposed to engage in earth studies and in particular to investigate humans and find out what makes them tick. Talyn's instruction to her was to study her peers but she soon confuses this with piers and, starting at Brighton, embarks on a tour of various piers where she becomes involved in a series of conversations with the people she meets on these piers in the belief that this is where conversations are held on Earth.
She asks Talyn to transmit some Earth money to her and, in the process of collecting that money from a rubbish bin, gets into a spot of bother with Jack, Nick Quirke, the rubbish collector and only extricates herself from this situation by agreeing to treat him to lunch. As a cover, she pretends to be a student doing a project on piers and when she meets Jack for a second time, he gives her a list of all the piers in Great Britain - taken from the internet - and advises her to try Eastbourne Pier next, which she does,
When she meets Jack again, on the beach this time, he confesses that he is not really a rubbish collector but a teacher and offers to help with her project. Her mentor, Talyn, advises her not to get involved but this is easier said than done as Elizabeth has become intrigued by the fact that she is beginning to experience human feelings herself such as - dare we say it - love?
She now begins an alphabetical tour of all the piers in
Jack now begins to adopt a more protective attitude to her and they embark on a quite surreal round of B & B experiences on the Isle of Wight, at the end of which Jack declares his affection for her but she tells him their love can never be. They return to the mainland and, being pressed by Talyn with the threat of an immediate recall from Earth before it is too late and confused by her own feelings, she breaks off her relationship with Jack, dematerialises and transports herself to Llandudno, Jack's home town. Jack catches up with her in Llandudno and while he again declares his love for her, he is confused by her ability to reach his home town so quickly.
Some people thought the play was fresh, original and entertaining while at least one member thought it perhaps needed more jokes. There was some discussion as to whether the distinction between peer and pier was defined clearly enough and that we perhaps needed more details about Elizabeth herself. There was also a feeling that the Talyn character could have been developed a bit more and that while there were some amusing touches, perhaps the play itself was a bit too long and there were too many abrupt fades on the background voices - while one member thought that those background voices were very good, almost poetic. Overall, members felt that reaction and inter-reaction in the dialogue was good.
September Club Meeting
by Fred Partridge
Dressed to Perfection
by Dawn Rowlands
by Trevor Harvey
Dear Wendy
by John Brennen
When the play opens, Ken Carpenter and his wife (Wendy) are at a quality restaurant waiting for his boss (Bruce) and his wife, (Miranda) to join them. We learn that Ken is soon to retire from his post a chief accountant and that he has arranged this intimate 'celebration' meal, before the formal farewell which is due to take place a week later. Among items of information, we discover that a young female called Lacey will be taking over as chief accountant, that Ken and Wendy are not suited to one another and that the less refined Wendy is not keen to spend an evening in the company of 'that cow' Miranda. Through a series of inner monologues, interspersed from Ken throughout the play, we gradually learn the real purpose for the dinner party.
Ken's monologue (writing a letter to Wendy earlier in the day) reveals that he is aware his wife has been constantly unfaithful to him- 'How many betrayals? I would like to add things up, to make the books balance' - and that for some time, she has been having a relationship with Bruce. Ken has chosen the restaurant on purpose because it is the place where he knows Bruce and Wendy have previously met. Gradually, we discover that ken is secretly planning to leave Wendy that same evening and that he and Miranda are in love, both despising their less acceptable partners. Halfway through the meal, Miranda excuses herself (to attend a prior engagement). Soon after that, Ken also leaves the restaurant (to make a 'business call' on his mobile) and fails to return - leaving Bruce with both the restaurant bill and with Wendy.
On discovering the truth, Wendy is in a panic and decides she wants to live with Bruce - but it's clear Bruce is tired of her and already has plans to take young Lace, the new chief accountant on a 'business trip' to America. We learn from Ken that Lacey's qualifications are fraudulent, which is the final twist of the knife. Ken and Miranda sail off to enjoy a new life together, in contrast to the debris that they leave behind.
In the discussion that followed the reading, it was felt the play would work as a radio piece and that the characters were well differentiated. John Brenenn had provided a humorous and workable plot, which (although sometimes predictable) contained several good twists and turns. However, a couple found Bruce's language was dated at times - and the dialogue would benefit from being crisper and shorter, as sometimes points were repeated. As a radio play, most felt it would benefit from cuts to bring its length to the more usual 30 or 45 minutes. For example several thought the foreign waitress was an unnecessary character, Ted McFadyen disliking the humour at her expense. And, just by way of general information, Thomas Everchild stated that the BBC now has a limit of five actors for its afternoon plays.
Initially, I felt the play could have ended when Bruce and Wendy found Ken's letter - but certainly their reactions afterwards brought humour and renewed life to the piece. A visitor particularly liked the inclusion of Ken's monologue whilst writing his letter to Wendy and thought perhaps this device could be used more often (but at shorter length) throughout the play. Finally the readers, Ted Mcfadyen, Pippa Hammond, Nick Quirke, Thomas Everchild, Anita Gilson and in particular
July 27th Club Meeting
by Michael Rowlands
The Urban Robinson Crusoe
by Des
There were a fair number of guests and visitors in the audience, to listen to Des Marshall's three act play, which he had adapted from his autobiographical novel. Eleven short scenes depicted the tribulations of Crusoe, a self confessed loner, who complained that people regarded him as 'invisible'. His alter ego, Robinson, dispensed criticism and advice. At the end of Act One, Crusoe's nephew, Gus, descended on him, but Crusoe couldn't be bothered with him and fled to
Staying with his friend Jane, Crusoe enjoyed a new freedom in
The final act was set in a hospital ward, where Gus was recovering from a suicidal (?) fall. There was much heart searching, and after a crisis, Gus recovered and Robinson persuaded Crusoe to do the decent thing and look after him. Crusoe's final journal entry emphasised the need for 'love'.
The standard of reading was very good. Michael Morely and Dennis Evans playing Robinson and Crusoe Respectively, with Josephine Carter reading the stage directions. Nick, Anita, Denise and Pippa took the other roles.
The play generated a lot of discussion, about the relationships and contrasting personalities of Crusoe and Robinson, Crusoe's roller coaster moods of optimism and pessimism, and the rather maternal attitude of Robinson. The comments then drifted into a conversation about the author's portrayal of typical
There was little outright criticism of the play, which was a study of a case of self obsession. Most of us thought that the use of two characters, Robinson and Crusoe, to illustrate this was an interesting device. However I felt that the plot was thin, and there was little variation in pace. Despite a few good lines, the situation did not provide any real dramatic impact, and I wonder whether this subject was really suitable for a stage play.
June 27th Club Meeting
by Judy Upton
Zena Christy Is Dead
by John Glander
We don't find out who Zena Christy is until well into this radio play by John Glander.
The story starts to unfold with an opening narration containing monologues from the main characters about the situation. 15 year old Sheila starts dating 26 year old
By now we know that Sheila has told
A lively discussion followed the reading. Roy Edinburgh, who had played Alan the brother, liked the play and he and Trevor Harvey both thought it began strongly with the separate monologues. Trevor and many others, including myself, couldn't believe however that Gary, a 26 year old, would be fooled by the girlfriend he knew as Zena, telling him she was someone else and a stranger to him, and that his real girlfriend was dead. Fred Partridge felt the separate voices in the monologues at the end went on for too long, and others agreed that there was too much exposition generally. Giles made the point that Sheila's journey from seemingly level headed teenager to dual-personality in a psychiatric ward was largely unexplained, and happened abruptly. Several of us felt all the characters spoke with very similar voices, and the actors confirmed that they were hard to differentiate on the page. Holly, playing Sheila, told us that the teenage characters didn't sound like real teenagers, though conceded that this is a hard thing to pull off. She added that in practical terms, the 15 year old Sheila would not these days be able to hang out in bars, as she'd have to produce an I.D. The play, 2nd prize winner in last year's radio play competition, is billed as a psychological thriller, but would perhaps better be described as a drama.
John Glander, the writer, informed members that the characters should have been played with estuary accents. The actors replied though that this was not obvious from either the dialogue itself or the stage directions. The play had been written some time ago, and exists as a novel too. John wondered whether some of the information from the novel, which would have better explained Sheila's journey, needed to be brought into the radio version
May 11th Club Meeting
Brighton Festival Fringe
Thomas Everchild
The Disappearance
a play for radio by Giles Cole.
Winner of the Sussex Playwrights' Club radio drama competition.
Alison Nash (Bea Mitchell-Turner), wanted to meet a man for companionship, "someone to have a drink with..." and to this end she visits a local bar with her friend, Yvonne (Philippa Hammond). Here is Carl (Roy Edinburgh) who has chatted them up before and who Yvonne thought was "OK."
On this Friday night Alison's life changes forever when she is witness to a killing apparently committed by Carl.
Alison agrees to testify against Carl, and things begin to go wrong, beginning with a telephone call to Yvonne warning of a contract out on her friend.
Quite why this warning is delivered to Yvonne is not clear, and this is just one of the little oddities that left the audience questioning Yvonne's role in what followed.
Flagged as an "intimidated witness" and offered "witness protection," Alison's problems escalate as she is blackmailed into testifying and isolated by the police. She reports "...I was advised not to visit friends."
The court case goes horribly wrong for Alison and Carl is acquitted. Alison's problems are only just beginning as now the officially innocent Carl has decided to carry out his threat to deal with her.
Alison flees to France and stays with an old friend, Maddy (Patti Page), whom she hasn't seen for years. What follows may or may not be a result of Alison's paranoia, but a growing feeling of unease builds with stones through windows and noises in the night. In a curious and slightly unconvincing "Tales of the Unexpected" revelation we find that Maddy has a secret of her own.
Alison's fear finally drives her to leave, disguising herself with a new hair cut and colour, and runs, somewhat surprisingly, back home where she "...took the risk of ringing Yvonne and getting her to be at the house waiting for me."
By this time you expect Carl to be at her house, and he is. Carl menaces Alison until there is a phone call from Maddy, Alison manages to deliver a secret message that something is wrong and Carl menaces some more before revealing that he knows that Alison has warned Maddy, and then leaves, menacingly, but without really doing anything. Although this chilling scene is well written, I was wondering what it was all for.
Finally we find Alison relocated and with a new identity, in a new town, wondering when Carl or his mates will track her down.
The audience reaction was unanimously positive, Roy Edinburgh was complimented on his menacing delivery and all agreed that the play was well written, contained nothing that was irrelevant, had a great atmosphere, was nicely paced, held the attention and made good use of sound and flashbacks.
Some would have liked more of the story of Alison and Yvonne and one commented that it was not clear if Carl was actually the murderer. Overwhelmingly the play was considered a worthy winner of the radio drama competition.
Looking at my notes I see that I was concerned that the play proceeded largely by exposition, Alison tells us the story as if reading from a novel, interspersed with occasional dramatised scenes within which there is also much exposition. I'm not sure whether there was exposition within the exposition, but on the night I was prepared to believe that there was.
A few years ago, it may have been more than a few, I attended a meeting with a Radio producer who spoke in grand terms about Radio being an "unbound medium". Radio special effects were better than the most expensive in film was the mantra of the time. You could tell stories that spanned the world, the universe, all of space-time, have casts of millions, write from the point of view of flowers, clouds, super intelligent shades of the colour purple. Well that was all before cost cutting, and I'm reliably informed that in the twenty-first century BBC Radio like their plays with as few actors as possible. So perhaps this play is just right.
The play was uniformly well read by a talented cast. I did agree with almost all of the positive comments on the night. But then I came to write this report and on re-reading the play things began to change. This is a play that works perfectly well at a single sitting, but if you start to consider the unanswered questions it throws at you, the plot unravels. You get the feeling that the incidents, characters and their behaviour serve the story rather than drive it. If you were in rehearsal you would be constantly fielding unusually relevant questions from your cast about what actors like to call motivations.
Carl's attempt to stop Alison testifying is fine, but his obsession with getting revenge even after his acquittal is probably the most interesting part of the play. His guilt or innocence now irrelevant, is Carl driven by some terrible incident in his past that compels him to take this revenge on Alison? Then there is Yvonne's possible betrayal. Why does Carl let her leave at the end? Is he confident that she will not call the police? I no longer care about Maddy at all, both she and Alison are not so much victims of the men in the play, but of the writer's need for victims.
Giles Cole is a good writer, and this is a well written, atmospheric play, so well written that you tend not to notice the many unanswered questions. There is here a much better play, should Giles now choose to write it.
April 20th Club Meeting
By Michael Rowland
Annual General Meeting
Attendance at the 2008 AGM, held in the New Venture Theatre was rather disappointing, though it did include at least one brand new member.
After the Chairman's report, delivered by Rex, the usual apologies and the minutes of the 2007 AGM, it was reported that the Playwrights' Club plaque in the theatre Royal has now been moved to a more conspicuous position.
The secretary reported that the website had resulted in a significant increase in membership, and the average attendance at meetings last year was 24. Thanks were made to Nicholas Quirke for the work he had done on the website and generating new members. The Club sponsored the NVT season, which was acknowledged on their programmes. Special mention was made of Edna Owens's sad death and her valuable work for the club. Members of the Club had gained 1st and 3rd place in 2007's Radio Play Competition.
Thanks were given to Denise Boxhaul, who in the absence of a treasurer stepped in to do the accounts and to present the Treasurers Report. Mention of a £160 windfall credited to the club from the building Society Merger was made. Our Financial position is very sound, but our expenses still need to be administered with care. The need for an auditor was discussed.
Rex relinquished the role of the Chair, but remains on the committee. Nicholas Quirke was elected as Chairman. Denis Evans is continuing a Secretary, whilst the post of Treasurer is still under discussion. Bea Mitchell Turner will replace Mike Rowland on the committee.
Unfortunately the Club does not have a license to run the bar at the NVT, and this generated a lengthy discussion. Alternative solutions which could be considered included the use of the NVT license as an umbrella, or free wine provided by sponsors, donated by members, or an increase in subscriptions. The committee will have to further consider the matter.
Patti proposed a vote of thanks to Rex, for his stint as Chairman, which was endorsed by the meeting
Pensioned Off
By Judy Upton
After the AGM was completed, we enjoyed a presentation of Judy Upton's radio play, which won third prize in the 2007 competition.
The play tells the story of a female judge, Nola, (played by Patti) who is all set to retire in comfort to
While she is trying to locate him, she becomes aware that quite a number of other retired people have disappeared, all pensioners from well paid professional jobs. Her investigations draw attention to her activities, and suddenly she is kidnapped by a couple of amiable thugs, carted off in a van, and disembarked along a corridor to a mysterious chamber.
She awakes to find herself in a shop in Brighton and walks home only to realize that she has been transported back to the year 2008 she is later accosted by other transporters from the future, and informed that the 2208 government has spent all the pensions budget on global warming provision, so have disposed of the pensioners via a 'time rift'.
Nola meets Brogan again and plans to get them back to the future.
A lively and enthusiastic discussion followed. The audience felt that the story had been told very clearly and effectively, with good dialogue. The play made some interesting sociological points and developed into an intriguing Sci-Fi plot. Some members felt the ending was too 'cosy', and the logic of the move back into the future seemed shaky. It was also suggested that 200 years was too long a 'time hop', as technology (e.g. money, transport, communications) may have developed even more radically than was suggested in the play.
The other parts were well read by Giles, Michael, Nick, Dennis, Richard,
March 30th Meeting
by Ted McFadyen
'Lucky'
By Lee Morton
Cast:
This was something out of the ordinary for us- a play for TV. This meant that instead of what we normally understand as stage directions - unobtrusive indications of essential time-shifts or movement, we were subjected to a detailed description of what seemed like every frame in a near two hour piece of work. Tiring? In a word, yes.
And what were the actors doing meanwhile? Well there were ten of them, including the remarkable
So to the plot: George an unhappily married man, is instrumental in causing the death of his wife by cunningly training the eponymous dog, Lucky, to push her downstairs. Afterwards she haunts him. His motive was either to claim the life insurance, or half of the business they jointly owned. Or both. I'm still not sure.
Several of the audience said they couldn't fully understand it, and even the author, in discussion afterwards, said he found it difficult to follow.
In these reviews it is customary to comment on the individual contributions of the readers. Frankly, I find it impossible here as the short snatches of dialogue took second place to the relentless visual description; which in itself gave virtually no opportunity for acting. But
I don't doubt that it would make a good TV play, and indeed most of the audience appeared to think so. But please- bring back our tried and tested stage plays.
February 24th Meeting
by Giles Cole
WILL THERE ALWAYS BE AN
by Mike Rowlands
For the reading of this play, highly commended in the 2006 competition, we departed from the normal arrangement of a simple line of chairs and were greeted by three clearly labelled areas where the action of the play took place. We also had the readers undergoing (admittedly minor) costume changes and a practical telephone buzzer to punctuate the action at regular (in the opinion of some, too regular) intervals.
The play centres on an ambitious politician named Alfred Legrate (read by Mike Hollands), the leader of the "Independence Party", whose clear aim is to reclaim England both from Europe and from the rest of the British Isles and whose political acumen is similarly ingenuous. He is incapable of making any decision without reference to Marilyn (Anita Gilson) who combines the business of being a mistress with that of being his "think tank". Which of her duties came first is never entirely clear. He also relies heavily on the goodwill and the favours of his private secretary, Virginia (Bea Mitchell-Turner) and the forbearance of his wife Prudence (Barbara Hendrick). We are very much in the realms of political comedy, although serious issues such as immigration, an English parliament and the abolition of the Human Rights Act jostle alongside that of a Prime Minister whose trousers rarely remain attached to his waist. Good knockabout stuff, perhaps, but ultimately neither funny enough to succeed as a comedy, nor political enough for the characters to have anything much more than cartoonish dimensions.
The plot concerns Fred's bringing down the PM of the coalition government and then himself winning the ensuing general election and attempting to put his separatist policies into action. The style is episodic, with many short scenes split between the three ladies and the three acting areas, and Fred flitting manfully between them. There is some fun to be had in this schematic approach, there are some amusing exchanges and reversals, and, as Mike Hollands said afterwards, the dialogue does flow along nicely, but - and this is the big but - does all this add up to a sufficiently engaging and entertaining piece, which reflects the intentions of the author, and which would persuade a perceptive audience that they had had their money's worth? That, I suspect, is a trickier proposition. The play is neatly written, it scores a few satirical points, but it fails finally to pack enough dramatic punch and one is left with a well-intentioned piece of work rather than an outright success.
To be fair to the author, he himself admitted to "inadequate editing" and he may well have gleaned enough from the reading to sharpen the play up considerably. Another opinion was that it could have been darker in tone in order to mitigate the fact that some lines were "verging on the offensive". One new member approved of the decision to "act it out" rather than do a straight reading, and felt that it was a good compromise, while others were less enthusiastic. There was unanimity, however, in the appreciation of the efforts of all concerned - even if the telephone buzzer featured a little more forcefully than the dulcet tones of the late lamented Edna saying "the telephone rings".
January 27th Meeting
by Phillipa Hammond
"But How Will It End…?"
by Tevor Harvey
Cast:
Roger Alsop - Anthony Reed
Henry Jones - Nick Quirke
Fiona/Two grumpy female overseers/woman on Tube - Bea Mitchell-Turner
Fiona's father/1st young male/2nd man on Tube - Dennis Evans
Maisie Wiggins/Magistrate - Anita Gilson
Fiona's mother/Defence counsel/Newsreader/Prison visitor - Patti Page
2nd young male/1st man on Tube/Judge/"Kind" warder - David James
Thuggish warder/College dean/Prosecuting counsel - Roy Edinburgh
The play is written as a comic story read aloud by the lead character "Alsop", with little interjections and scenes from other characters. One audience member likened the effect to The Goon Show, with suggestions that the piece needs to tilt one way or the other - play or story. Some story elements could have been cut out, and the story generally simplified. There was a little confusion over who's who in the courtroom scene, which Trevor will address, plus "Alsop" could be established in the audience's mind as a photographer earlier on.
Dialogue was described as natural and believable, clever and sharp, although it was agreed that it was rather a monologue with some other voices, becoming more so as the play progressed. Brief sentences gave lightness, and the interjections won a lot of laughs. The general conclusion was that there was too much narration in the piece, tempered with an effective variety of voices and characters.
The lead character "Alsop" reminded many of Michael Caine's Alfie, a perhaps thoroughly unpleasant character, yet Trevor's handling made him attractive and likeable.
The play delivered plenty of laughs, with even some energetic slapstick comedy through words and imagination, while the little characters really lifted it. Snappy speech and some smart speedy delivery of the fast moving exchanges were highly effective, saving some characters from seeming sinister and so becoming more acceptable.
Some readers read a little too quickly, being inclined to fall over words and swallow them up, occasionally losing variety of tone, clarity and pace. A snappier pickup on the lines improved as the play proceeded. Special mention for Bea's colourful and clear reading and for Dennis's fruity elderly gentleman!
Trevor thanked everyone for their thoughts, saying that listening to it for the first time was a most useful exercise. He had become aware that there was perhaps too much monologue, and that "Alsop" could actually take on some of the voices himself. He felt that he could cut out some of the characters and bits which did not seem so necessary now, and that more dialogue [less tell, more show] were needed. He also concluded that "Alsop" explained some things that were not needed, and that other characters could simply do them instead.
The audience agreed there was definitely lots of potential in this tale of a charming, amoral but amusing chancer, blackmailer and thief, who comes out on top in the end - much to our satisfaction.
"Last Sitting"
Cast:
Man - Dennis Evans
Waitress - Barbara Hendrick
Woman - Bea Mitchell-Turner
An entertaining and engrossing tale of a man who believes he must grasp his final chance at finding love. But in the course of an evening he finds himself embroiled in a con, a bank robbery and a most unexpected change for the better.
The dialogue was described as "brilliant - it really flowed " to general agreement, although there was a suggestion that the piece flagged a little in the middle, and that the lines at the end of the play were not as snappy, and less humorous than at the beginning.
The plot showed careful construction, with a most unexpected set of developments. One comment suggested that the general tone was a little too gentle, nice and cosy, and that it would benefit from more of an edge, while The Woman remembering the
There was some debate over the lead character of The Man, who was thought to change halfway through - some felt that he was very funny in the first half, both a wit and a figure of pathos to begin with, but as the plot complicated that character became a little lost and did not sustain, perhaps becoming rather sentimental? Others felt in contrast that he grew according to the changing situation, developing from a passive victim to a man making his own life.
A few were uncertain about the role of The Woman. Trevor agreed that the character needs more shape, and that the revelations about her true identity as an undercover police officer passed by too quickly - some had not registered them.
The Waitress was felt to be a lovely part for an actress, with an amusing, acerbic yet sympathetic performance from Barbara.
Trevor once again thanked everyone for their comments.